Last week I wrote a post sharing the fact that I am sometimes unable to do or say what God is asking me to do and oddly this used to not be an issue for me. But I have been plagued by this desire to hide, rather than allow my light to shine. I am consistently finding myself paralyzed by fear and though intellectually and spiritually I know that is a wrong attitude…I still seem to go there.
Yesterday God through a brick at me.
In the form of the sermon at church and the music we sang during our praise and worship time. I mean really…did the Pastor read my blog and build his sermon around my post last week?
Suffice it to say I am now spending time intently studying Philippians 1:12-30 as it so directly is related to the battle I have been in for the past several months.
I do want to be courageous and speak the words God has given me to speak, understanding that in doing so I will encourage others to speak of His goodness and truth. I need not concern myself with others, or their motives, I need only speak and realize that as long as Christ is shared I should rejoice. I need to in no way think I am unworthy to speak, or be ashamed – it is Him speaking through me. I will let the joy that surges through me be evidenced as Christ’s joy and not hold back for fear of offending or calling attention to myself. It is not me, it is Him through me. I will stand firm for the gospel and not be frightened by what anyone thinks of me. I will believe, I accept what has been granted unto me for Christ’s sake regardless of the suffering. I will boldly glorify God with my life.
I will not believe the enemy and his lies, I will trust God. My joy influences people for the Father and joy is the enemy of the evil one…I will not allow the evil one to steel my joy. I will persevere, I know the truth about how to have joy and I will share it and no longer be silenced.
Joy is the intense fulfillment of carrying out God’s’ intention for me. I know what His intention for me is and I will joyfully speak and bring Him glory!
It is all about Him and I have sufficient courage to obey!