Be the Mom

paperbackfront2Be The Mom – avoid attitude traps and enjoy your kids (Tyndale House Publishers)

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The role of mom is often described as the most important job in the world. Rightly so, for so much is at stake during children’s early years and moms are central in shaping character and personhood. However, when the going gets tough (the endless diapers, the continual messes, the endless conflict resolution, the complete lack of personal time, etc.), moms are often tempted to quit their “mom‐job”. While few would endorse an outright abandonment of motherhood, others may recommend that a woman treat her role as secondary to personal desires in order to combat feelings of discouragement and/or unfulfillment. The enemy has laid intentional traps cleverly designed to discourage and redirect a woman towards self rather than family. Moms need to know how to recognize these traps . . . and avoid them. Be the Mom: Overcome Attitude Traps and Enjoy Your Kids explores and validates the life of a mom who makes her family a priority and introduces the reader to seven Mom Traps that may be preventing them from a full, joy‐filled life.

Please note that all author proceeds from the sale of Be the Mom go to Project 319 at Pine Cove.

Encouragement from moms impacted by Be The Mom:

“I bought your book Be The Mom, and OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!!! It was awesome! I would put it on the top of my list of favorite books! It spoke straight to my heart! I am a do-er and I struggle with the be-er part. But now, I find myself saying {to myself} ALL the time “BE THE MOM!” Thank you! I’ve passed it on to a friend.”        ~ Erin

“Just heard your broadcast on bott radio network and I cried. I am stuck on more than one of those mom traps and I have had this realization for a while, but cannot seem to change it. I go to bed every night with the weight of my guilt on my shoulders. I wake up every morning to see my attitudes being played out between my kids(heart breaking) and STILL cannot find the strength to change. I feel like somehow, even with a completely broken and humbled spirit over this issue I am just sinking into myself and my own falleness; the tragedy being that my children are going down with me. I HATE who I am as a mother. I would have resented my mom for life if she had treated me as the burden and obstacle that I treat my children as. At the end of every day I lay my head on my pillow and cry because once again-self, and anger, and self importance have stolen my chance to evangelize my children. Your broadcast hit home for me and I just wanted to thank you for your honesty. I can’t wait to read the book. I know the answer to my sin is found in Christ, but it is helpful to hear from others who have clawed their way out of the traps.”

“Tracy, I’m typing this with one hand as I nurse my fourth child who is four weeks old. The others are 6, 4, and 2. So needless to say, when the focus on the family broadcast came on the other night (while I was bouncing a gassy baby and chanting “this too shall pass! This too shall pass!”) I got teary eyed as I heard you describe that moment on the stairs where you and your babies were all crying at once. I ate up every word of both broadcasts and have been devouring your old blog posts while I nurse since then. This is why: I am a “Martha” through and through and highly gifted at To-Do lists….all the while kicking myself for not BEING with my kids more. Although the Lord has been speaking to me for years about “being” more than “doing, your story of the widow, the challenge to have “To-Be” lists, the encouragement to have fun, etc…it’s all been so timely for this weary heart. I have been thinking differently the last several days and suddenly find joking, funny things come out of my mouth when before I would have been too quick to get stern. I played Lego today while my unfolded laundry sat (and still sits) on the couch..and I was the one who dumped it on the floor! All this is just to say THANKS for being faithful with the message God has given you: I am one of those moms out there that received from Jesus because of your courage and obedience! Bless you!”  ~Jacki

“Tracey, Thank you for posting Jacki’s comments. That is exactly where I was until I listened to the broadcast on Focus on the Family! Thank you so much for sharing! I can’t thank the Lord enough for your healing message!”     ~Lena

“Thank you so much for all you’ve gone through, and the honesty to share with others. I have three kids one 5 one 3 and one 1 1/2 so life is so busy. The to do lists seem so long I can hardly breathe sometimes, but I really want to take the time to really play with my kids. I decided to spend time with my little 3 year old yesterday while the other one was asleep and just sit with her while she watched Hi 5. When my eldest son came home from school, she went and played with my youngest so I could do homework with him… normally she is all over me and demanding that I give her attention. Then when Dad came home, he commented on how good she was… Dinner was then so easy to make without someone at my feet.
I pray that I can make good memories with them now and that I will stop “putting them in the other room” so to speak, while I finish my to do list”.
          ~Rachel

“I am so very thankful for your broadcast with Focus on the Family. I am a mother of two children, Hannah (3) and Benjamin (2). I relate to what you shared about your surprise of being pregnant. After 9 years of marriage with no pregnancies, we divinely adopted Hannah, bringing her home from the hospital and then discovering a month later that I was pregnant with Benjamin! They are exactly 8 1/2 months apart which makes for fun conversation in the grocery store! I truly love each day I spend with them, yet surprised by how overwhelmed I can become with motherhood. I thought I was cut out for this call, yet nothing has exposed the weaknesses of my flesh as motherhood. So, thank you for being vulnerable to share your experiences and your heart, while offering sound and practical encouragement and advice – heart motivated! I am refreshed and encouraged and thankful for the sufficiency of God’s grace and mercy, to Be the Mom! Blessings abundant to you.”    ~Michele

“Tracey, thank you for your transparency! I listened to you on Focus on the Family and loved your interview. It was very encouraging to me as a mom of four little ones. The part about folding towels really hit me, and I was reminded to rely on the Holy Spirit in my mothering. Thank you also for commenting on my blog and putting my post on your facebook page when I first started my blog. I was still figuring out the technological side of blogging (still am  ) thing and I never responded, so THANK YOU for your encouraging words. Blessings! Looking forward to reading your book!”     ~Sarah

“I am only 4 chapters in but my way of thinking is already changing. My days are already changing. My heart is changing!! I haven’t read even half the book but today I gave myself a BREAK and had some fun. I attached a pic of my kiddos having fun WITH ME! We went out and played in the back yard and I left my vacuum cleaner sitting right in the middle of the living room!

I left my 6 figure job in August when it was time to return from maternity leave after the birth of my daughter. My husband had said during the entire leave that it was impossible for me to not go back. BUT the day I was to return he realized it was IMPOSSIBLE for me to leave her. Poor guy! We are still trying to figure out what we have to do to keep me home so you KNOW I WANT to be here. But it’s been hard adjusting because I was so good at my job and it was very performance based. And last time I checked no one was handing me a bonus check for washing that same darn dish for the 6th darn time!! I needed to breathe and I guess my dad, of all people, could see me smothering myself. Its almost like, “I had better be DARN DARN DARN good at this every second to PROVE I did the right thing staying home.” The first chapters of your book have already already taught me that 1) I am more normal than I thought and 2) I did the right thing. What a load off my shoulders!

So today we played!!! And my son then helped me vacuum and I didn’t even redo it. His job was to get the big pieces up off the floor from bringing the wood in so baby sister couldn’t eat them.

I can’t wait to read more. I am thankful for your book and your posts and am excited about what tomorrow will bring. According to my son it will include popcorn”.   ~Heather

“I just wanted to say thank you for speaking to our MOPS group via Skype this week, hearing you was such a blessing! I have transitioned, just in the last 2 weeks, from being a working mom to be a stay-at-home mom, and have been struggling big time with letting go of my former identity and feeling like “just a mom.” then trying to counter that feeling by attempting to be the “perfect mom”- another trap! It has been a hard transition for me, and your words were a grace from God! I hope to get your book soon, so that I can spend more time focusing on these important truths, and learn to become the mom God wants me to be. Thanks again!”     ~Erin

“I just wanted to take a minute to tell you that your broadcast on Focus on the Family and your posts on Facebook have been a huge blessing and a wonderful source of encouragement to me. I have been feeling so down lately in my role of being a Mom, and your timely words and heartfelt, Godly wisdom have lifted me to a place of hope again. Thank you so much for all that you do….and may God continue to bless you as you bless other Moms!”      ~Renee

“I just want to tell you how encouraging you are. I am a mother of two young boys(4&2) and I am going through divorce at the moment. Being a single parent has taught me so much and I learned to appreciate every single time I spent with my children and have grown to be excited with the time and adventure i’ll be sharing my with two children. Every time I feel the pain of my failed marriage, I would always tell myself the words I heard from you on the radio, ” Lord, help me to be content even if I don’t get the desires of my heart.” I keep on repeating this statement over and over again as well as Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you for your words. You dont know how helpful they are to me.”    ~ Crismel

“….you put into words so much of what I have been living the last few months…..so much guilt, fear of failure, comparing myself to others etc etc. I am 30 yrs old and have 3 pre-school children –
Levi nearly 4, Aria 2 and 1/2 and Micah 5 months. To be honest the last 6 months have been the absolute hardest of my whole life!! I two have sat on my sofa with my three kids all of us crying!! Anyway I don’t want to go on and on, but just wanted to thank you so much for sharing what you did and encouraging Mums like me who feel like every day is so hard. God bless.”     ~ Esther, New Zealand

“I was really encouraged through reading ‘Be the Mom’. Encouraged that my job as a mother is the most important job that I could undertake, and encouraged that God will equip me in the role.”       ~ Leah, Northern Ireland

Without a doubt, the best written and most helpful book I have read on parenting yet! It was challenging, encouraging and practical and I’m already planning who I can buy a copy for!  ~Hannah, Czech Republic